Shame on Me
I think I remember the first time I felt shame inside –
When something happened that made me want to run and hide.
I was in a Grade 5 gym class – my first attempt to climb rope,
When the teacher mockingly told me I didn’t have a hope.
If instead he would have helped me to build some confidence and strength –
I know I would have gone to any length…
Instead he made me feel terrible about myself,
And I shoved any interest in being an athlete to the back of the shelf!
And, even though I excelled at everything else at school,
This “failure” made me believe that I couldn’t be “cool.”
Sadly, we often take for granted whatever we can do well –
It’s the areas where we fear we’re “less than” that we tend to dwell!
At school I had a good friend who wasn’t academically great,
And the teachers made her feel like she just didn’t rate.
But she was so pretty, and nice, and as popular as could be –
That she had the best life ever, seemed so clear to me!
Years later she told me that she had wished for my life
Because her school days were filled with constant shame and strife!
So, we both felt socially like we were not good enough –
But our shame was the result of some very different stuff.
We know a lot now about how a childhood scar
Often continues to have a strong impact on who we are.
Brené Brown explains how “shame gremlins” can have a lifelong effect,
On who we become, and how well we connect.
But, though it’s true they play a part in how we learn to relate,
Our old patterns do not have to be in control of sealing our fate!
She talks about “whole-hearted living,” and I’ve come to believe
That this is a way of life I really want to achieve.
I have the intention, and I’m finding my way,
And I am so grateful for what I’m learning every day!
We can all transform our lives once we decide
To take responsibility for being in charge of this ride!
It’s called being “at cause” in NLP –
Not at the effect of others – continually!
And, really, when all is said and done –
Being the driver of your own bus is way more fun!